"Half-dead but into action" Read the full letter
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Letter ReferenceLetters/404
Archive
Epistolary Type
Letter Date12 July 1890
Address FromMatjesfontein, Western Cape
Address To
Who ToHavelock Ellis
Other VersionsCronwright-Schreiner 1924: 191
PermissionsPlease read before using or citing this transcription
Legend
When Cronwright-Schreiner prepared The Letters of Olive Schreiner, with few exceptions he then destroyed her originals. However, some people gave him copies and kept the originals or demanded the return of these; and when actual Schreiner letters can be compared with his versions, his have omissions, distortions and bowdlerisations. Where Schreiner originals have survived, these will be found in the relevant collections across the OSLO website. There is however a residue of some 587 items in The Letters for which no originals are extant. They are included here for sake of completeness. However, their relationship to Schreiners actual letters cannot now be gauged, and so they should be read with caution for the reasons given.
1To Havelock Ellis.
2Matjesfontein, 12th July.
3
4I spent some days in Worcester with Ettie on my way up and was very
5ill there. But I got here early this morning and am better. You know I
6feel a little lonely sitting here alone in my house after I've been
7among human beings. I had a happy time in Cape Town; they were kind to
8me. ... You know people do make fun of my not having been able to eat
9with other people, and do perhaps tell lies about me, but I don't
10think that anyone really can believe it. It seems such a ridiculously
11small thing to cast such a shadow over a life as it has over mine.
12It's so bad to be ridiculous; however, it doesn't matter. ... I am
13well, but I'll never be quite strong unless I marry, and I never will.
14